Ok, So I'm the Dragon

I hate wearing uniforms and today was full of them.  I'm a huge believer in showing someone that I work here by the way I treat them.  Not from this tshirt I have on.

I think tshirts take me back to Jr. High and I freaking hated Jr. High.  Who wants to remember back to when they were a head taller (at least) than all of the boys.  I never showered back then.  I rarely shower now too, but that doesn't matter.  I was also so insecure that I thought my "funny" sense of humor aka making fun of everything and everyone was the coolest thing ever.

I was such a douchebag I'm sure...

I mean, whenever I spoke I was a d-bag.  I didn't talk much.  Have you ever heard of a speech impediment?

This girl has.  That's all I'm going to say about that (in Jr. High I would have mumbled/slurred that so you wouldn't have any idea what I said).

Also, sidenote, if I ever work with Jr. Highers like at a Rock Tower class or something like that they'll bring that insecurity back out, but thankfully now I'm much quicker than they are with their sarcastic comments.  I'm not worried about making a jr. higher feel ridiculous, just as long as they don't do it to me.

Back to uniforms.  It's super hard to come up with anything original to wear when you have to wear a navy blue tshirt or polo.  Now, I've been thinking about this outfit for a while and I was excited about wearing it today.  I put on my glorious brown heels (they look vintage but they aren't), gray tights, a gray/white striped skirt, a brown belt, the BP tshirt, and my super faithful mustard cardigan.

Here's the look

These shoes don't make me look a giant

I really loved it and I felt like an English school girl in it which was so fun.  

After regular work today I also worked a banquet for the camp.  The uniform was white and black.  Most everyone wore black bottems with a white button up, but I will take any excuse to wear a vintage dress.  I found this dress in Olney, Il (the home of the white squirrels) and picked it up for just a few bucks.  I've fallen in love with the high waist, A-line skirt and interesting collar.  It has such a good feel to it.

It came with a black and white thin belt but I switched it out for a red one (to match the table decorations--that may be lame).  

Clothes can change the way I feel about myself.  A baggy tshirt makes me feel insecure and puts me right back in my gawky, junior high body.  A vintage piece makes me feel like I've got a secret that everyone wants to know.  

I love secrets.

whatever,  I said it.  

I'm very much a girl in some ways... but don't make me watch Sex in the City... or even think about it

I'm getting very cozy with this hair of mine.

I apologize for my freaky stare

So, here's some good news.

We took Gordon to the pound.

I know, I know I should be sad, but fuck it, I am not.  Brad cleaned the couches and the carpet last night (I was painting my nails at the time... it sounds like I'm lying but I'm not) and they aren't covered by dog hair now and they won't ever be again.  I'm sure that years from now I'll remember all the good things about Gordon and think of him with fondness, but at the moment I'm just glad that there's nothing that's going to eat the insulation around the water heater any more.  Gordon was way more of a douchebag than I was in Jr. High.  Trust me.

Maybe I'm a horrible person.

I'm going to leave you thinking about whether I am or not.

Goodnight

Bruises

that title is for Alli Faye. Things hurt for a bit, but things get better.

I also happen to be listening to this song
Bruises by Chairlift

So, I have today off.  Not because I'm a teacher, but my schedule just worked out like this.  Can I just say that days off are phenomenal.  I mean I slept until 10:30 today and now I'm just doing the rounds at local coffee joints.

Right now I'm in Zocca and I had a cinnamon soy latte and sausage, egg and cheese panini (slightly greasy and super delicious) and I'm thinking of going on and getting a smoothy at another place in a bit.

Enter pictures of said food and coffee

Days off are heaven.

This morning I went to take pictures of Brad working on the mini golf course (he's designing/building one for our camp) and today they were pouring the concrete for a few holes and I got concrete on my dress.

Who gets concrete on a dress??? This girl.  I'm raising my hand that has ink smudged on parts and dirt under my fingernails.  I swear that even when I'm forty I'm going to be writing reminders all over my forearms.  One of the guys told me that it washes out.  Let's hope.

Where I'm sitting I can see a little girl that just got out of a car (her parents I assume are getting out soon) but she's playing with a bouncy ball in a parking lot.  Am I weird for being totally concerned for this girls safety?  If I ever have kids I'm going to have ulcers and my husband is going to make them do dangerous things.  I'm sure of it.  But, come on, that bouncy ball is going to go out into the middle of the parking lot and she's going to get hit and it will be my fault.  geez.

Ok, she's fine.  I'm sure all of you were holding your breath.

Now a change in subject (sorry about this but I'm listening to music and every song change makes me think about something else--heck it's my day off so I can do what I want).

I walked down the aisle to Ingrid Michaelson's Breakable and now whenever I hear any song by her I am immediately in that moment before I walked in.  My heart always beats faster and I hold my breathe.  I didn't really get pictures taken at my wedding (for money reasons) and now I'm regretting that.  I just brought back my dress from Illinois and I'm thinking about having a friend of mine take pictures of me now (almost 2 1/2 years later).  Is that stupid?  My hair is about 14 inches shorter now, but I love my dress and didn't really get anything that I can hang on a wall to make me remember it.  Any suggestions about what I can do picture wise of if I should even do that.  I don't know.  I'm always worried that I'm being frivolous, or selfish or being horrible in some other way... so let me know.

There's a local lavender ranch that I'm thinking might be the spot.

In between my coffee/smoothy stops (I feel like my dad and his coffee buddies going from cafe to cafe to shoot the shit) I stopped by a picnic area and tested out the self timer.  Two of them turned out a little unfocused but one's alright.

This is a dress that I got for my Bridal Shower almost 3 years ago.  I LOVE it.  I wear it through the entire year (sometimes with flats, in between times with tights and boots and during the winter I just add a grandpa cardigan).  I adore the whimsy, old-fashioned feel of it.  It has satin, pintuck and ruffle detail and the cream color just makes it feel soft and charming.  

I feel like this dress will enjoy my whole life with me.

I cooked dinner for the first time in the new place tonight.  I made rice and sauce with tomatoes, Italian sausage and some veggies.  I still feel like this place is not home at all.  I'm hoping that cooking here will help me settle in, but it's been tough.  There's not any good work stations here to prep for meals and I'm just ready to go.

Brad and I are moving to San Diego at the beginning of this next year and I can't wait.  I've been to San Diego twice and just fell in love with it.  

I'm ready to be with similar people with similar hearts.  I'm ready to be able to smell the salt in the air.  

Here's to good changes and to Columbus Day.

Hope yours was great too.

Gordon the Jackass

Hello everyone,

It's S A T U R D A Y!!!  It's really almost Sunday, but hell, I love that day too so no sadness or tears here.

Today was fantastic with it's touches of my crazy outbursts that are almost always towards the genetically defected Gordon.

Meet Gordon

I'll admit that he's a good looking dog but boys and girls DO NOT BE FOOLED.  Gordon is a crazy lunatic of a dog.  It's a crushing blow to the husb and I because we both love dogs.  Brad has had plenty of dogs before and have trained them to excellence.  Gordon insists on just being insane.  I kind of admire his tenacity in that area but don't tell him.

Gordon is a very tense, neurotic dog.  Anything can set him off from his gurgling water bowl, to tissues, to wallets.  Sometimes he's great and funny and calm, but whenever anyone that I want to impress or have them think that I have any capabilities at all comes over he acts like a freaking lunatic.  He barks and growls at passerby's (even though he really just wants to play with them) and lunges at you like he's going to bite your face off.  He's probably the most selfish being I've ever met and I worked at a climbing gym for a long time.  

I just don't get it.  I'm pissed off about it.  He also sheds like a banshee.  If I loved him I would clean it off with some sense that it's worth it but geez it is not worth it.  There's no companionship, no feeling of love from him.  It's pretty much just a take relationship with him.  

Have I mentioned that we live at a camp?  A camp full of gentle retirees and playful kids?  This is the worst dog to have in this scenario. These guys just want to come and meet the dog on that leash over there and then they find out that my dog is a bastard.  I feel like making banana bread for an apology to everyone, but the number's way too big by the end of the day.

If you walk by our cabin I really apologize for him.  I swear we tried our hardest.  It's been fruitless toils and I hate him.  You can have him though if you want.  I mean I would pay you to take him.  I'd let you punch me in the face.  twice.  to take him.

Ok Ok Ok Ok

Enough about the dog

Let me tell you about my child like behavior when it comes to video games.  

I know this is a huge switch in topics but it's in my head because I'm a horrible human being when I play any game at all.  

This video gaming has only been happening since the move to our new place (to kind of make up for some of it's miserable components--have I told you how many country geese I have on my wall? Not to mention the Master of Light, Thomas Kincaid, relics) so we have a Wii now and some other games and such.  I'll admit it, I'm bred to be competitive... I'm also a twin and you get that if you're a twin as well.  I simply hate to do bad at things or not win.  It's why I have basically sworn off all games (I also despise Apples to Apples so DO NOT ask me to play that monstrosity disguised as a friendly game).  

I'm such a horrible person when anything competitive happens.

I'll get better though.  I swear.  I'll get more better than anyone has ever gotten better at anything.

Today though (being Saturday) had some free time that B and I figured we could play some games during.  Which we did.  I was a sore loser for about one whole hour today.  Eff you Mario Cart. 

I hope I make up my stupid parts to Brad with good parts.  I swear he's a saint and I'm a smidgen better than a wailing 6 year old at times.  

After the fiasco of my finagling my way into last place in every game we played Brad brought me into town to raise my spirits.  Now, I live in a campground with gravel/mud roads and it feels like it's actually a town that hasn't been touched by technology since 1950, but we are also on the outskirts of a touristy mountain town.  The tourists are sadly Texans but I'm not going to get into that in this already novel like blog post.

This town is actually pretty gorgeous.  This is a kind of sad photo but I took this today on the way in.

We've got Mountains and dark, cool pines for as far as you can see.  Really, really gorgeous.  The drive consists of a curvy, hill-laden road and it smells like Christmas 365 days out of the year.  In town you'll find cafes, ice cream/candy shops and all types of souvenir shops.  Sometimes I hate it, but most of the time it's nice.

Today was definitely one of those days.  People come from hot Texas and you can just see the happiness in their faces.  Whenever I get depressed about the lack of fellowship here I think about how so many people look forward to coming where I am for their vacation and escape from the world.

We went thrifting at the Behr Barn, but didn't pick anything up (it's hard to walk out of a place like that without some finds but our current just moved about to move situation makes me not want to get anything at the moment).  It's a converted bowling alley and it smells like mothballs and dust (I love that).  You can find anything from old shoes (always in a size 6--which makes me hate tiny, petite girls even more), to furniture, to weapons.  Now most of it has a Southwestern vibe which I'm getting more used to but still have qualms about, but some times you strike gold there (get it--strike??? bowling alley??? Yep).  It's soothing to just walk around junk/antique places and forget about your life and just let the story of the things around you fill you up.

The Behr Barn

All around I must say today was a great success.

Oh, and  I also met this guy today

IT'S A HORNY TOAD!!

These animals are so great.  This one was injured but I think it will be fine.  They look and move in a way that makes me real happy. And I love to be happy.  And I hope you're happy and not dreading the week too much (it's a coming)

Love and Well Wishes from The Land of Enchantment (that's New Mexico you betya)

Fashion Post I

First I have to say that Brad (the husband) and I just moved into another cabin here at the campground so it's a bit of a mess and the decor is not really us.  It's a happy thing because it means that we sold our cabin (our first home together that we loved and made into the perfect little place) and we're one step closer to making the move to San Diego (cue Angels singing).  The downfall is we'll only be here for 3 months so we're living out of boxes and we won't be making any design changes at all.  So it's country blue and red plaid for a while.

Most of the time I'm in my Camp uniform which consists of a navy blue tee or polo and I pretty much feel devoid of all creativity.  When I come home I immediately change out of it.  In the mountains though there's really never a reason to get fancy schmancied and if I ever just do it anyway I feel like people stare at me like I'm an alien or something (I'm so close to Roswell that reference is more annoying then funny to me).  So usually I try to keep it really casual but still a bit fun.  That's usually exactly how I feel like dressing anyway.

Today I came home and changed from flats to boots (because in the mountain it gets freaking frigid the minute the sun goes down), put on a tee that I actually like and added a chunky vest that's color makes me want to go play in the forest.  I also have a off white rosette barrette in my hair (my short short boy hair).  I'll tell you all more about the hair later, but know that I'm trying to be as feminine as possible and actually I'm kind of loving the do lately.

This outfit is pretty basic for my after work clothes

I wore the bottom half to work (except with flats)

The boots are Fergilicious (I just like to say that)

The chunky knit vest and tights are Derek Heart

I got the tee on vacation in Colorado at a Pac Sun

Enjoy the mess of my cabin :)

Cabin Life

I live in New Mexico

Not desert New Mexico::: please don't confuse

I live in the mountains of New Mexico, in a cabin, on a camp.  This all translates to a very quiet, slightly quaint life.  During the summer the whole place is overrun with kids (which is fantastic--really) but during the retreat season it is unbelievably empty.

We are surrounded by pine trees and it's maybe one of the most beautiful places I've ever been.  It's rains an hour or so every afternoon (I know I'm blowing your mind with all these things you thought didn't happen in New Mexico) and afterwards the sky has this sunny, yellow hue and it makes everything look like a vintage polaroid.

I'm doing this whole blog thing basically for my sister but I'll be honest and say that I've been thinking about diving in for a while.  She lives in St. Louis (the Mississippi is in my blood) and she's gorgeous and fashionable and brilliant.  So I started this blog basically to be able to comment on hers.  We've always loved clothes and maybe we always tried to dress differently because we're twins and you get complexes from being a twin.  I don't know.  Just a thought.  My goal for this is to share my style, thoughts, creations and stories with more people then just my husband (the best person ever) and my dog (the worst dog ever).

I hope that since I have this blog that maybe I'll try to be more creative in all aspects of my life.

And this will be one of my ways to share it with some people who don't happen to share my New Mexican camp life.